Sometimes I feel like I am trapped inside of me. A hardened man beaten into cynicism. I don't always want to be the one to point out the bad but I can see it so clearly. It mocks me with its obviousness.

But I contradict myself with my dedication to 'the cause'. I push forward unrelentingly, with my cynical attitude, yet somehow believeing I can change the world. Believing I can alter popular opinion when it seems to defy logic to me.

Sometimes when I am trying to help, I will inadvertently hurt. My skin is like leather and I expect the same from the world. I have a hard time remembering to use tact and decorum with a preference towards blunt. I forget words on a forum lack inflection. Those words lack the obviousness of my sometimes sarcastic tone or the quick smile I flash when talking in 'real life'.

This is a shortcoming of mine that has plagued for a VERY long time. I started conversing with people on the internet using Usenet and the groups I would use had no censors, no moderators and no owners to filter content in any way. I was free to say WHATEVER I wanted and those that got offended just had to accept it.

Well I guess old habits do really die hard because this monkey has been on my back for around 8 or 9 years now that I have been using web based forums rather than usenet discussion groups. My lack of a personal filter often gets me in trouble with forums. I have seen very few that can actually handle me. More often than not when I get disciplined on a forum there is not even a rule infraction, I just get left with a message that my 'attitude stinks'.

So now I am stuck in a quandary. I MUST find a way to change my habits. I hate that I have to do it but in my experience that will only fuel my drive to make sure it gets done. I have a passion for these stupid things and the need to be able to network with a large audience is to important to advancing my own agenda of spreading PV use.

I really hope I can do it cause I am turning 40 next year and I am definitely getting to old to be bouncing from IP to IP registering new usernames on forums when I get banned for being to outspoken. Maybe this time I will actually learn the lesson that I need to do more than just follow the rules but more importantly I hope I can learn the lesson that you can offer someone information but you can not force them to think.

DW

All the best with that Waldo.

It's certainly a fine line to be a free thinker but still be able to collaborate with a crowd.

Thanks Kate,

I think I will do my free thinking over here and try to keep it off ECF. It seems that ECF is more concerned with trying to make SJ a 6 figure income rather than offer a place to engage in open discussion.

The latest victim... RatInDaHat just made his farewell post citing "Recent time constraints and policy decisions of the new management" as his reason for leaving.

DW

Well, I've managed to get myself banned there too so it looks like anyone who won't be pushed around is going.

The sad thing is that Smokey Joe used to allow uncensored debate and more self regulation, if anything the rules were under enforced.

The new style of micro management doesn't sit well with a mature membership.

That is just retarded.

I wonder how long it takes before the supporting suppliers get hip to the fact that SJ is giving it away for free to Blu when all the other 80 supporting suppliers have to pay for it.

I wonder how long it takes before the moderators get a clue that Blu is not spamming the forum, It has become a popular brand because it is the most prominently advertised product on ECF. Since I have been browsing the forum without being logged in I have realized that the Blu banner ads that seem to be the displayed banner 3 out of 5 times is the single most prominent feature on ECF.

The choices SJ made for mods seem to be about the worst he possibly could have made. Are ANY of the moderators experienced with forums? Why would a known hot head like Terraphon be chosen? will he get a clue when the veteran posters continue to drop like flies?

Is it a temp ban or a perma ban? This is the second time you are banned right? The first time being for calling some con man a con man right?

DW

The ban is until Friday but there's not much to attract me back there.

Lol, yes I was banned before for calling a con man a con man.  It's a funny old world, hey.

At least some of the other good forums like this one will be getting a bit more traffic if ECF implodes.

The mod situation is madness, I'd rather deal with trolls than the supposed cure.

Cure? I am done there... I had about 30 PM's asking where you and I were going Kate Some asked if we were getting a room! LOL!

I have a Domain called VapersForum.com.

Waldo...  u wana run it for me? You and Kate can  be the mods lol Ban anyone who we don't like!

Hi Spikey sweetheart

You've been naughty and dared to speak without permission, haven't you

I heard you'd been banned.  I think somebody in power is psycho over there and is well out of control.  It's the Borg Queen ... you will be assimilated, resistance is futile.

I have been a VERY bad girl... spank me! Oh wait.. I got that backwards.. I will spank u

I think "she" has gone CRAZY power hungry and no one is moderating her!!! SHE needs a ban (time out/whatever!). It is not just her tho.. other mods are a bit crazy as well.

I am gona start my own forum and see if I can get some of the orthers (the good ones) to join us if you will come...

DW That was probably the most soul-full post I've read on a board.  Thank you for sharing.  I like feeling as though I'm in a place I can trust.

I'm really glad I ventured beyond.

Spikey, you put on a class act. My hat is off to you. You did a lot of good stuff for ECF and the real members.

Hey, all 

Can I come and play, too?  This site looks cool!

Spikey, if you start a forum I'll join in.  Unfortunately I wouldn't  be able to be a mod or anything responsible, I'm as committed as I can be with the collective community effort at Right to Vape.

Thanks for your honest efforts at ECF, you did good girl

Hi everybody, Taz, Dohs, Christina, Bryn

Spikey,
take a day and let things settle in before making any decisions. ECF is not going anywhere and we need the exposure ECF affords to allow other people to find the club. Please do not let your emotions make the decisions, and let your head do the thinking. The club is about more than just you or me and I don't think breaking away from ECF is in the clubs best interest.

You know I don't paticularly care for the new hypocritical and arbitrary style of iron fisted moderation that is going on at ECF right now but hopefully it is just growing pains and those involved will find a place where they can perform their obligations to the site without trying to be such bullies. In the mean time, SOMEONE is going to have to eat some humble pie and I can live with being the one to do that. I will speak to SJ tonight when my ban is lifted and see about taking charge of our clubs forum and social group while you are away.

YEAH, this really does suck a lot and it is unfortunate that some of the newer mods at ECF don't seem to care about community. It is unfortunate that you and I have been spending a lot of time and effort working to promote the best interests of a COMMUNITY and it might seem as if the community is un appreciative but that is not the case and if you let one or two power greedy pricks spoil the whole thing I feel you (and I) will feel great remorse down the road. I don't think either of us is doing anything for the glory so we need to keep on point.

If a decision is made, with a level head, that the club needs its own forum independent of ECF you know I would be reluctant to moderate on it but if it needs to be done I am not afraid of stepping up to the plate to do it. I couldn't offer much help setting the forum up as that is not my forte. If you need I can bootleg the crap out of whatever software might be needed to run the forum but I have no experience setting up a forum.

All I ask is to please give it a few days and let your emotions settle. You know if it were not for you I would have flamed the crap out of ECF with dozens of different accounts in the first days of my ban but you pulled me back from that ledge and a few days into it my emotions settled and my head kicked back in again. Afford yourself that same opportunity. Don;t let rash decisions come back to hurt you or the club that you are working to help build.

There WILL come a day when we will look back at this and laugh, I promise you that.

DW

BTW to Christina,
Thanks for those words, I take it as a compliment. I wrote the OP because I needed to see it myself. It was very therapeutic to put some of my thoughts down in words and I needed the grounding. I am very happy that someone else was able to appreciate it but it was actually one of my more selfish acts because the only one I was interested in benefiting with my OP was myself. Fortunately I think it worked and if it can help someone else then that is a great added bonus but I can not take credit here for an act of benevolence. Not this time at least.

I am sorry but I don't think I can tell the story. It would cast a negative light on someone that I can not afford to piss off. The Long Island Vapers Club needs a presence on ECF and I do not want to get banned again.

Maybe one day the 'managerial issues' that caused RatInDaHat to leave will be rectified over at ECF and I will be able to tell the story but right now I care more about maintaining the LIVC than I do about placating my own ego so I must remain mute to avoid further incidents.

DW